Wednesday, February 5, 2014

Dark Come Soon

FeBLOGuary Day 5 : what are you afraid of

I think my fears are pretty common, two things really: being alone and failing.

I don't mean like being alone, oh my god I have to go to the movies alone or go home to an empty apartment. I mean like being truly alone, not having anybody that I could just call up and talk to for no reason. Not having that friend that when I'm having a bad week, and don't want to talk about it, we can sit there, in silence, and that's okay. I currently am so blessed (knock on wood) to have many of these types of people in my life and I CANNOT imagine what it would be like without them there. 

Failing is another deep seeded fear for me. I think it partially stems from my only childless. They say only children feel a greater pressure to succeed because there's no one there to pick up the slack if they don't do well and I would definitely agree with that. My whole life I had to do everything right, play sports, get all A's, perfect attendance, president of every club, go to college. I honestly feared I would get disowned when I decided not to attend grad school. Luckily my mom is one of the people I mentioned in the previous paragraph and was super supportive. Though now I feel an even greater pressure to succeed in this path I've taken. 

I don't really know that there's a way to overcome either of these fears, and if any of you know how please tell me so I can stop having mild panic attacks all the time. 

For today's song I've chosen a song about my favorite band. There's a video out there somewhere of Tegan talking about how this song was about her plea for nighttime to come so that her nights & weekends minutes would start so she could make calls and make sure people hadn't forgotten about her. This isn't that video but it's great nonetheless. 

What are you afraid of? Who's afraid of the dark? 

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